Every dimpled drop?

March 30, 2004

It is not raining to me, It’s raining daffodils; In every dimpled drop I see Wild flowers on distant hills. - Robert Loveman (1901)

When I remember who forgot to send me a production journal this week I’m going to stick daffodils up their butt until they rain out their dimples, you hear me?! - Brad the Coffee Guy (2004)

Since I really have nothing of import to share this week (I kind of fufilled my vent-quotient talking about Dave Sim and “Cerebus” last week) and someone, someone, has forgotten to send me a production journal - I thought I’d dip into our vast archives of production photos and share one with you. Unfortunately everything I could find contained dire plot spoilers and nuggets of information that would ruin, nay decimate, your enjoyment of episodes to come… except for this one.

Who says the spirit of innovation in filmmaking is dead? Not I, good sirs. Not I.

If you’re still craving intellectual pursuit there are many interesting discussions ongoing at DeadEndArguments… I mean… the forums including a currently popular film about a certain Nazarene philosopher, Jason’s high score in Zookeeper, and mortal hand-to-hand combat over the merit (or lack thereof) of Panic Room.

You also may (or may choose not to) notice we have zome new “Amazon” buttons over there on the right (or waaaaaay down below if you’re reading this on a cell phone). If, hypothetically, you are the type of person who occasionally buys things through Amazon such as Books, DVD’s, Computer Games, Music CD’s, Clothing, Kitchen Utensils, Bath Accessories etc… and if, hypothetically, you were click these buttons (or banners occasionally showing up above) before you do so, a portion of your purchase would be, hypothetically, directed by magic leprechauns to help pay our ever increasing server costs. Thank you magic leprichauns!

The most famous aardvark in the world…

March 26, 2004

We’ve got a new episode up, and if you kids are anything like the uber-high-tech Editing Machine 3000 (The Editing Machine of the FUTURE) you’re going to love this one… or blow up halfway through… hard to say.

I don’t soapbox much in this space, so if you’ll indulge me for a week it’d be appreciated.

This month marks the three hundredth and final issue of a pretty obscure black and white comic book from the wilds of Kitchener Ontario, which I think radically changed the face of comics, cartoons, publishing, the Internet, and creator owner properties as we know it. Way back in 1977 a young lad named Dave Sim, decided he really needed to share his comic creation, a silly parody of the (stupid) 1970’s “Conan the Barbarian” books and novels with a 3′ aardvarkian protagonist named Cerebus. While the early issues certainly were no great creative or artistic revolutions, Dave’s decision to eschew established publication channels and just print and sell the book directly was. Much has been written about the “self publishing” boom of the late 70s, early 80s, but Dave was certainly one of the marshals of the charge. Before the Internet, vanity publishing, “independent”, “zines”, suffixing things with “garage”, Dave paid to print however many issues he could and hoped they’d sell… either by mail order, or by his driving around to every store he could.

As time went by and Dave inexplicably didn’t starve to death two things happened:

1.) Dave Sim and his self-publishing ilk inspired a new wave of comics creators to think long and hard about issues such as creative control. They made it clear that, unlike their industry predecessors they didn’t have to toil unrecognized and unrewarded for the profits of faceless corporations to work in an industry they loved. Certainly 80’s superstars (and multi-millionaires) Peter Laird and Kevin Eastman (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) and Todd McFarlane (Spawn) were directly influenced by Sim’s work.

2) Dave Sim began to create some of the most compelling cartoon storytelling since Eisner. His cast began to swell and with his increasing skill he told complex tales of society, family, religion, and politics with a deft combination of acerbic wit, and brutal emotional honesty. As the series grew and Sim’s stock seemed unlimited, he made a statement that most though unthinkable – He (and collaborator background artist Gerhard) would continue to self-publish “Cerebus” as a two man operation until issue 300. Such a project would ultimately span over 6,000 pages entirely written and drawn by Sim and Gerhard. Most saw this as hubris, at best, and gave little thought that Sim could follow through on his claim.

With this month’s release of issue 300, Sim and Gerhard have completed this monumental task. While I would like to report that the end came with the pomp and circumstance deserving of such an acheivement (with the adulation and recognition of the comics industry and a huge financial windfall for the creators) the truth, like many of Sim’s stories, is a more sobering subdued affair than one might have hoped.

“Cerebus” ultimately cost Sim his marriage, detractors (of which I am not one) would say it cost him some measure of his sanity, and it certainly was traded against countless years in his creative prime where he certainly could have been making better money doing something easier.

Certainly in it’s latter years the series (which began to include epic multi-year discussions on religion, gender, and art) was clearly overshadowed by Sim’s increasingly vocal personal politics - which alienated some readers who couldn’t separate the quality of the creative works from personal views of the author they disagreed with.

As such, “Cerebus’” readership never exploded into the hundreds of thousands it deserved. Towards the end of it’s run it lived on a few thousand dedicated subscribers and the fairly consistent sales of 500 page “phone book” editions reprinting the series to date.

This essay itself is growing far longer than I intended so I’ll sum up with a few points I feel very strongly about acknowledging:

1. Without creators willing to sacrifice everything for the sake of uncompromised art we would not have ever had books like “Cerebus”, “Love and Rockets”, “Bone”, “TMNT”, “Spawn”, “Posion Elves”, “Action Girl”, “Pickle”, “Hepcats”, “Theives and Kings”, “Ninja High School”, “Box Office Poison”… or the legion work by the artists and writers these works inspired. Whole imprints of independent artists such as Slave Labour Graphics, or Drawn and Quarterly perhaps wouldn’t have come into being. Some of the most definitive graphic literature of the last 30 years would not exist. Period.

2. Sim’s accomplishment regardless of the contoversy that dogged him personally can not be overlooked, and should (hopefully) stand as the milestone for personal acheivement in a creative field for a good long while. While there are certainly moments of brilliance in each and every issue of “Cerebus” the epic storylines “High Society” and “Chuch and State” will likely stand the test of time as some of the finest graphic literature ever committed to paper.

3. Without “Cerebus” there was a world of independent publishing (especially “before my time” indies) that I never would have discovered. “Cerebus” introduced me to the wonders of the Marx Brothers and inspired me to go look up more information on the life (and death) of Oscar Wilde. I have spent more time inspired, confused, bored, angry as hell, distraught, enraptured, and laughing my ass off while reading the series than any other creative endeavor I have (or likely will) read or view in my life - unless some other 6,000 page work comes down the pipe.

I’d like to take this moment in this very small public forum available to me to thank Sim and Gerhard for nearly 30 years of mostly unheralded work and let them know that one of the lucky ones they reached will be raising a glass in their honor tonight and drinking to them, and to all artists who have pursued their creations, no matter the odds, and no matted the cost. In many houses worldwide I would suspect that “Cerebus” draws to a close neither unmourned nor unloved.

Cheers.

[Editors Note: I accidentally originally posted a draft version of this essay including the rather egregious oversight that my spell checker had replaced every instance of "Cerebus" (the aardvark) to "Cerberus" (three headed dog with a lizard tail guarding the gates of Hades, 12th labour of Hercules) ... thank you to everyone who e-mailed, I am _well_ aware of the difference.]

[Editors Note 2: Thank you to everyone in the Yahoo! Cerebus Mail Group who pointed out that 3" is three INCHES and 3' is three FEET. If you Yanks would just switch to metric like everyone else we could avoid these misunderstandings and all agree that Cerebus is about 1m tall, yes? Seriously though, thanks for the interesting feedback I've received]

Wagon the Circles

March 23, 2004

[Editors Note: Since Jay will no doubt whinge if I don't show him the same courtesy I gave Shane, the delay in today's Production Journal was entirely mine - trying to finalize the press kit Jay speaks of before actually letting you guys knew it existed... so the delay has nothing to do with the following entry... which remains the lasiest piece of re-purposed writing yet to grace the front page :~) Good on, Jay.]

As I’m more inclined to sip Earls-sized margaritas whilst basking in the nearly twenty-degree sunshine (that’s Celsius for you Yanks) than write the requisite production journal, I’ve decided to cobble together bits and pieces from various other DED-related writing I’ve done over the past two weeks, and string them together into a pseudo-coherent whole. The astute amongst you can infer several personality traits (read: behavioral dysfunctions) from this, but here’s the trick: Minimum Effort, Maximum Impact – TO THE EXTREME! (Doesn’t stuff sound so much more exciting with “TO THE EXTREME!” tacked on in italicized caps with an exclamation point? Radical.)

Luckily, this obvious neglect of responsibility (Hooray for spring!) couldn’t have come at a better time.

Now that Dawn of the Dead has shot to the top of the charts, usurping that Jesus-gets-the-shit-kicked-out-of-him-for-two-hours movie (which, if you think about it, is also, essentially, a zombie movie. JESUS: The Original Zombie), zombies are officially back in fashion. En vogue, even. Which couldn’t come at a better time for your trusty purveyors of weekly-live-action-internet-serialdom. Because our thing is about zombies too, if you hadn’t noticed.

I saw Dawn of the Dead on the weekend, and while Matt’s cornered the movie discussion market, I will offer the following two observations:

Observation One: It was really nice to have a couple of leading characters I liked, and also nice to have a character I didn’t like turn into a character I did like in a way that made sense. I get awfully annoyed when characters in terrible situations gripe at each other like sitcom castoffs, instead of acknowledging that they’re FIGHTING FOR THEIR FREAKIN’ LIVES, and find some means of working together.

Observation Two: What’s happened to the zombies? It seems as though, as of late, zombies have morphed into rabid superhuman animals, instead of the quiet, lurking, stumbling, uncoordinated beasts we know and love. It’s a different kind of menace, but I’m not sure a more effective one. Now zombies can run at top speed, break through panes of glass with their fists, scale chain-link fences and hop over razor-wire. They’re competent, agile, and strong. I have to say, I miss the creeping, the slow but steady overwhelming, the terror that builds, almost unseen, until it’s too late.

And I think this new concept of the uberzombie detracts from their inherent metaphorical aspects, something I addressed in our press kit:

“The nice thing about zombies as a central conceit is that they’re an easily malleable metaphor. One can easily interpret Invasion of the Body Snatchers as a comment on communism, or Dawn of the Dead - the second and most critically acclaimed of Romero’s Dead trilogy – as raising concerns about capitalism, rabid consumerism, etc. 28 Days Later clearly portrayed zombiism as a virus, a disease, and posed questions about human monstrosity – asked us what the difference is between their barbarism and ours. Our fears surrounding cultural homogenization, of reverting to core, base instincts, of our own inherent animalistic ancestry all play nicely into the threat that zombies represent. It just depends in what context the artist places the monster.

As per the use of zombies in Dead End Days, they seemed to be within our budget of nothing. They also happen to play into my concerns about North American culture. The corporate, and by virtue, advertising machine is as enormous and wealthy as it ever has been. Even scarier is the consolidation of power, multinationals absorbing and assimilating other multinationals. We live in the age of “synergy” and “branding”, the psychological and behavioral analysis of “key demographics”. What scares me is how normalized it’s all become, and it’s the perfect environment in which to put zombies. What if they became the key demographic? How would that warp our culture? How far would we go to accommodate them? Exploit them? What are the consequences of that exploitation?”

(Boy, nothing like quoting yourself.)

In my opinion, the analogy present in Romero’s film didn’t survive the remake, and the underlying reason for setting the film in a mall is rendered meaningless.

But Dawn of the Dead is obviously a horror/thriller/action movie, and not a social commentary. So what genre is Dead End Days? Jason?

“I don’t tend to put a lot of stock into the concept of genre; typically the categories are too vague, and don’t really give you a sense of content. Saying something is a “drama”, or even a “kitchen sink drama”, doesn’t tell you very much about the work, any more than “comedy” does. Was Ionesco writing “comedy”? Was Beckett writing “drama”? Is Evil Dead II a “horror” film? In a sense they fit, and yet they don’t. The concept of “genre” persistently fails me when I try to define work for myself or others.

My stage work is mainly comedic, but the type of comedy changes on a play-by-play basis. I’ve written absurdist comedy, black comedy, political and satiric comedy, crude comedy, and so on. But even those expanded “genre” categories don’t describe the work all that well.

Take “The Simpsons” - though the show was fairly consistent over it’s first seven or eight years, the genre fluctuated within that time. The show has been goofy, crass, crude, spiritual, soulful, introspective, existential, and very politically savvy. I tend to lump this into the category of satire - which somewhat encompasses various aspects of these categories, though by no means entirely so. I guess my point is that “genre” is a tricky concept to nail down, and doesn’t often accomplish much.

If you forced me to, I would categorize Dead End Days as a social satire. The underlying thesis has a socio-political slant, so no matter where the various tangents go, in some way they have to adhere to that central thread. But if that’s the macro-genre, we’re dealing with several micro-genres. Ashley and Eric’s story is dramatic, Ashley and Bruce’s is romantic, Sam and Bridget are more comedic, and then there are the darker elements - Ashley being chased by the foot-dragger in Episode IV. And on and on. Genre - bah!”

Fascinating reply, and good use of the word “Bah!”

Now our press kit is to be distributed under the auspices of a Dawn of the Dead boycott, which was the rather brilliant brainchild of resident thespian Chad Thompson (re: “Bruce”). Shane and I wrote the following letter, which you’re free to distribute to the appropriate organizations:

Dear ______,

We are contacting you to ask for your support in boycotting a slanderous cinematic production which has recently been released into mainstream movie theatres nationwide. The material is unfairly biased against an alternative lifestyle and reinforces dangerous stereotypes. Dawn of the Dead threatens to stoke the embers of anti-zombiism, and could single-handedly undo the hard-won but still tenuous integration of our two societies.

The National Institute of Zombie Advancement has struggled for years to facilitate social awareness of the discrimination which the previously deceased face every day. Since the earliest horror movies, Zombies have been portrayed as mindless, homicidal beasts, wanting nothing but human brains. This is a stereotype that must be overcome, not encouraged. The modern-day living impaired should no more be seen as a brain-eating horde than the public at large should be defined by humanities past acts of barbarism. We must put aside our differences, brain-eating included, if our two communities are ever to peacefully co-exist.

The media should endeavor to reflect the efforts made on the part of the living undead to overcome stereotypes and win the trust and friendship of our human neighbors, and vast inroads have been made working in tandem with our undeceased counterparts. We are an integral part of the work force, a veritable boon the economy, and successfully lobbied against the much-debated Zombie Registration Act, a desperate political maneuver by an unpopular government seeking re-election through a transparent smear-campaign.

This is why we are encouraging all progressive thinkers about mortality to sign our petition located at http://www.petitiononline.com/hairycoo/petition.html to indicate to Hollywood that these age-old bigotries are no longer blithely accepted when re-packaged as “entertainment”.

As an alternative progressive form of entertainment, we would also like to direct your attention to Dead End Days a video series portraying zombie/human relationships in all their glory and complexity. This presentation is currently being released in five minute installments over the internet, and can be downloaded at http://www.deadenddays.com free of charge. The socially conscious creative forces behind the year-long project believe, as do we, that all people, living and nonliving, deserve a second chance. We’ve found their press kit at http://www.deadenddays.com/press to be an extremely thoughtful treatise on the subject and certainly far more nuanced and complex than the hate-mongering propaganda polluting our multiplexes.

Thank you for taking the time to reject the “old guard” of fear and suspicion and investigate new, socially conscious works such as Dead End Days. Through your diligence, the living and non-living may truly live side by side in harmony.

Sincerely,
Louise T. Bainbridge
President
National Institute for Zombie Advancement

Death isn’t the end, it just puts you in a new demographic.

Oh, and don’t forget to sign the petition.

And get me another margarita.

Obvious exits are to the North…

March 19, 2004

There was an interesting thread yesterday in the forums that grew out of a discussion of everyone’s favourite Roguelike game (incidentally I seemed to be in the minority favouring the venerable Nethack as most who had an opinion seem to prefer the also excellent Angband). Out of this geek-love-in someone mentioned the old mainstay of the Microsoft Entertainment Pack: Jezzball. I had almost forgotten how many hours I wasted on this QIX-clone… and was amazed to discover loads of excellent on-line clones. Good-bye productivity.

Speaking of productivity we also have a new episode, but you’ve come to expect that haven’t you?

When it Rains, it Pours Concrete

March 17, 2004

[ Editors Note: The delay in this thrilling production journal is by no means Shane's fault. If anything he so threw me by getting it to me so far in advance that I completely forgot to go through my Monday-night panic attack, which usually leads to production journals getting posted... sorry about that ]

You know how bad things are supposed to happen in threes? Apparently whoever’s in charge of karma for this film can’t count.

Then again, maybe we did tempt it a little. When we started Dead End Days, we shot four episodes per month, always in the first weekend. For February, we upped the ante a little, and squeezed six into one weekend. The surprising thing was, it went smoothly. We got everything we needed, it all looked great, and there were no major mishaps. So maybe we should have figured on a backlash this month.

We were going ahead with our fast new schedule, and were going to be shooting five episodes over March 6th and 7th. After doing six, it seemed like it would be easy. We arranged schedules between actors and locations, and everything was a go. That is, until Brad walked into work on Thursday, and discovered that his office, one of our key locations, was now a construction site.

It seems that there was a small problem with insufficient insulation below the floors. And someone had decided, in a split second, that enough was enough, and it was time to call in the military.

Hammering, painting, and sand-blasting were the order of the day, as well as the aforementioned work on the floor. About as conducive to work (let alone filming) as whooping cough. Brad tracked down a foreman to check their schedule, and yes indeed, they would be working all weekend, from about noon until midnight. So now, not only was Brad working in a warzone, but the two episodes we were going to shoot there were gone. On top of that, the air was so noxious that Brad’s throat began to swell.

So, two of five episodes gone. It wasn’t even Saturday, and we were down to three. Not an auspicious beginning. We waited anxiously for something else to fall through. But Saturday morning rolled around without any more bad news. So we loaded up and moved to our first location. (Which was Fuzion Cafe, on Danforth right near the Greenwood subway station. I have sampled the bubble tea, and can say objectively that it’s delicious!)

First order of business: pull the blinds off the walls. Not on purpose, of course. We were all excited to be shooting daylight episodes at last, and we wanted the windows as open as possible. So we lifted the blinds. Two of them worked fine. The third was booby-trapped, just for Matt. He touched the pull-string, and the whole thing fell down onto the plastic plants below. Without even a first shot in, we were already wrecking the place. We didn’t even turn around while we fixed it, afraid of what the owner, Andy, would say if we did. He was kind enough not to kick us out, though, and after that momentary panic we moved on. The shoot itself actually went quite well.

By our original schedule, we would wrap at Fuzion sometime around 1pm, and our next location wasn’t available until 8, so we were going to rehearse. But the way things were going, we wanted to shoot as much as we could before everything went wrong. So we decided to fit part of our Sunday shoot into that long gap. And a good thing we did too, as you’ll see in a few moments.

The shoot required Ashley and Bruce to walk down the street together. As we were setting ourselves up, though, we noticed a few police lights moving slowly towards us. No sirens, no screaming wheels, just flashing lights crawling forward at a turtle’s pace. That kind of thing gets distracting in a shot, to say the least, so we waited for them to come by. As they came closer, we realized that it was a traffic block for a marathon runner. Always ones to recognize opportunity, we set up the camera quickly to get a shot of Ashley and Bruce applauding the brave man. So, the first police car passes. Then the marathon runner. Then a van painted with the phrase “Run for Cancer Research”. Yes, this was a cancer marathon, and we had set up a dead guy to applaud from the sidewalk.

We moved on, trying very hard to put that inappropriateness out of our minds. The shot we needed was a long one, and required Brad to walk backwards with the camera while Ashley and Bruce moved towards him. For about two blocks. Brad bravely set himself up, and Lindsay, our makeup artist, volunteered to be his guide, to make sure he didn’t run himself into anything. I moved ahead to ask people to clear the way (which proved unnecessary) and kept my eyes on the script (also unnecessary). All in all, we had Brad run the backwards gamut five times. He looked like he’d been put through the dryer by the end, but other than that, it was remarkably problem-free. We moved back inside for a rush rehearsal before we moved on to our next location, Fat Phill’s on Marlee.

This shoot began quite smoothly. We arrived, paused for a bite to eat, and then began shooting. There were, in fact, no hiccoughs at all until we found out at 10:30 that the restaurant was not closing at midnight, as we had thought, but at 11. We had half an hour to finish, and at least 4 more shots to do, with multiple takes of each. We set into speed-shooting mode, but we knew at the same time that we would never be able to finish. By 11:15, maybe, but not 11. So our contact at the location, Chad, went to work. And in that strange way he has, he convinced the owner to let us stay after he was closed, to finish the shoot. With five minutes left, everyone looking panicked, he came back to us and informed us that we had all the time we wanted.

But we didn’t want to abuse the kindness, so we wrapped as quickly as we could. We had the last shot done by 11:10, and everything packed up by 11:30. With many thank-yous, we moved back out onto the street. Brad and Rob climbed into the car to take Dean and Shelley, two of our actors, back home to Brantford, and the rest of us rushed home to sneak in as much sleep as we could. Call for the next morning was 9am.

Everyone, surprisingly, was on time. Lindsay started applying Chad’s makeup, and Matt, Brad and I started going through the shot list for the day. Rob kept an anxious eye on the weather, which was getting colder by the second, and now had the distinct possibility of starting to snow.

We had half of our cast and crew, but we were still waiting on a vital component: three actors who would be playing the part of Young Punks 1, 2 and 3 (One of which is, in fact, our talented editor, Mike Thorn). Once they arrived, Matt hustled them through the layout of the scene, and we got them into costume. Within an hour of their arrival, we were ready to go out and shoot. We picked up the camera, opened the door…

And the first snowflake landed on our doorstep. And then more came, and more, and more. It was a full storm in five minutes. And we had shot the first half of the episode the other day, when the weather was clear.

And that was the final straw. We sent our punks home un-filmed, we apologized to Chad and Lindsay for having them do makeup needlessly, and we all contemplated whether it would be appropriate at this point to weep, or if that would be unprofessional.

So, by the end of the weekend, we had finished half of what we hoped, and all on the Saturday. We used the Sunday to watch footage, record voice-overs for episode 15, and calculate how many episodes we’d need to film in April to catch back up again.

Six and a half episodes will be on our plate. Our most yet. So hopefully, after this Greek tragedy of a shoot, we’ve now got some karmic credits in our favour. If not, we’ll make it work somehow. The show must go on.

Day Two: For a Better Tomorrow!

March 12, 2004

As I mentioned last time, today’s new episode heralds in a bright new day, a different day, a second day. Day two, as it were. I can’t begin to tell you how happy we all are to no longer be stuck in Halloween, like some kind of gothic Groundhog Day. We can finally get rid of all those rotting pumpkins in Matt’s hallway for starters. This nicely dovetails with our traffic loads indicating that we’ve moved a crazy amount of traffic this month so, thanks for talking us up! I can live with the fact that we’re not as popular as, say, a comprehensive history of the yeti and penguin flash games, that’s more than fair… that penguin needs to be belted into the stratosphere.

I hate that stupid penguin.

Oh yeah, and a special shout-out to our vocal fans at big blue - thanks for watching!

Be back here in seven short days for a man, a plan, a canal - Panama… er… actually it’s about Ashley stuck at work with a very disgruntled client… close enough.

Movies You Ought To Like Pt. 2

March 9, 2004

Well it seems as though the proverbial bottle is once again pointing in my direction so pucker up
people for another thrilling installment of:

Movies you ought to like (and if you don’t, you suck), by Matt HoosIn this months installment I thought I’d throw a little light on a director who just received the best director Oscar at last weeks silicone fest. That’s right I’m going to write about Peter Jackson (What’s that you say? Everyones talking about him? It’s unoriginal? Well I would’ve written about another western masterpiece The Quick and the Dead, but some prick on some “popular” website beat me to it, so suck it up!) Seeing as how he is yet another talented and accomplished director from an overlooked country that started his career in the zombie business, I thought I’d write my thoughts on some of the Jackson works that you may never have heard of (in other words - all of his movies that don’t start with the word Lord).

Bad Taste: Well what can I say? For those who have actually seen this movie I commend you for seeking it out because up until recently it’s a hard one to find. I bought my copy for five bucks from a dude in times square who either didn’t know what he had or was keenly aware of what he had. That is to say that Bad Taste is certainly an acquired taste. As Jacksons first released film, it is a grainy, hand held, 16 mm account of an alien zombie invasion on the coast of New Zealand. There’s plenty of extremely impressive amateur gore and a hysterical performance by Jackson himself as a zombie hunter. Most people turn it off around the part where the alien leader vomits 4 gallons of chunky blue puke into a crystal punch bowl and proceeds to pass it around the room to all of the hungry crazies who lap it up happily. For me this film is the embodiment of directorial potential. A guy driven to make his kind of film his way with his friends and little thought toward marketability. That kind of passion and commitment breeds ingenuity and it reads in the effects if nothing else. Watching it makes me all nostalgic for the films Brad and I made as kids. Not that we were making films of this quality (if you can call it that) but we were having as much fun.

Meet the Feebles: Well this is what happens when you and your buddies who are used to making movies for nothing suddenly get a little money. That in-joke “hilarious” idea that you’ve been carrying around for a few years suddenly becomes possible. In theory it’s brilliant; Muppets on crack! Feebles sees Jackson do with his puppets everything you always wanted to see Kermit and the gang get up to. It peels back the layers and exposes the cruel, hard drinking, drug taking, porn producing, STD transmitting, flashback inducing underworld that is producing live theatre. Like Bad Taste, Feebles can at times be hard to like. It can often feel like that joke that crosses the line so many times it loses its impact. That’s not to say it doesn’t have its merits. I am particularly fond of the scenes that involve the twitchy, pain killer addicted, knife throwing frog who keeps flashing back to his “Deerhunteresque” days in a Vietnamese POW camp. Brad seems to be quite attached to the large scale musical finale of the film simply entitled “Sodomy” [Sebastian Fox is one of the few caracatures of "The Theatre Director" that has any ring of honesty to it... because frankly, we know they're all about one thing - The Coffee Guy].

Dead Alive AKA Braindead: Billed as the most gory film ever made, Dead Alive picks up the thread started in Bad Taste. Once again Zombies are the issue only this time the wave of the undead is started by a flesh-eating rat monkey captured in the wild by none other than our man Peter Jackson. Dead Alive really reveals for the first time the inherent Lucas-esque understanding for visual effects Jackson has. This film certainly is bloody, especially when our hero tears through about 30 flesh eaters with a lawn mower, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have a sense
of humour. If it’s inspiration you’re looking for, you need not look any further than the kung-fu priest who “Kicks ass for the lord!”

The Frighteners: Dead Alive caught a lot of attention on our side of the pond. One of the people who took notice was Robert Zemenkis (director of future essay subject Back to the Future). Near as I can tell Zemenkis invited Jackson out of new Zealand to make a film over here. The result is again a substantial growth for Jackson, not necessarily in terms of subject matter, but definitely in terms of visual story telling. Say what you want about the film itself, I have no trouble watching it if only to witness the birth of some of the composition and colour that helped make the Lord of the Rings films what they are. Plus it’s got Michael J Fox in it and he will forever rule! (Self contained, underwater, breathing apparatus!)

Heavenly Creatures: After almost two decades of making increasingly impressive horror/comedy shlock Peter Jackson, while reaching for another donut no doubt, hit his head, passed out and when he awoke found that he had made one of the most touching, moody, and disturbing films in years. Heavenly Creatures tells the true story of two girls who conspire to kill one of their Mothers bcause she is in the way of the girls “special relationship”. This movie sees Jackson using ever tool he had acquired over the years to make a film that is simply striking (pardon the pun). I honestly have a hard time describing this film other than to say that if you haven’t seen it, you have to and that it has the best burn on Orson Wells since those Peas commercials you can find floating around on the Internet.

Aside from those films, Peter co-directed a mockumentary called Forgotten Silver, but I only ever saw it once in a video store in Vancouver, so if any of you reading this can fill me in please do so.

What’s next for our favourite Hobbit? His long sought after remake of King Kong for which Jackson has asked an unheard of 20 million dollar directing fee. Now normally I would say he’s crazy for demanding so much money, but from the looks of him I think he’s looking to play the lead himself as well as helm it.

Well that’s it. I’m tired. Go my children, take what you have learned and run out, straight past the blockbuster, to your nearest specialty video store and enjoy what one very large, hairy man has given to the world.

Peace.

Dead End Days Day One Ends… film at 11.

March 5, 2004

Up until last week’s unveiling of the story so far summaries, we were pretty quiet on discussing what the ultimate form of Days was going to be. Frankly we’ve known all along, it just didn’t occur to us that anyone would care. So as you may have surmised from the header of the summary page: Dead End Days will play out over the course of four days. This is an interesting point to bring up now as the first of these days (the aptly named Day One) is soundly concluded by this fine brand-spankin’ new episode.

This is exciting for a couple of reasons:

1. We have gone fourteen episodes without being so much as 5 minutes late. That’s over an hour of free internet based (so-called) entertainment. Yay us.
2. The major players are all introduced, and we can finally let them go do exciting things.

Frankly, I haven’t been this excited since we launched episode 1… and, as it’s not even midnight here yet (knock wood) am feeling that it is a very auspicious sign of things to come. Anyway, this is a great time to be hanging around these here parts… tell your friends to jump on the bandwagon while it’s still hot, we’re here all week (and next… and next… and next…).

I for one, would like to take this opportunity to thank the true power behind our rag-tag operation: Cola.

Also people are starting to receive orders from our band-spanking new store perhaps right as you read this! Everyone has had nothing but nice things to say about the quality of our junk, so why not buy copious amounts of our stuff?

Join us next Tuesday for Director Matt’s next production journal in his controversial “Movies you OUGHT to Like” series… word’s cannot express how annoyed he is that after months of planning Scott Kurtz beat him to the punch on The Quick and The Dead.

New Features!

March 2, 2004

What? Tuesday and no production journal? Whatever will you read? Can we please suggest Mesdames et Monsieurs direct their attention to the brand new shiny buttons on the right? The Story So Far… is a new feature which has been vocally requested by folks on the forums who can’t always keep up to date on the latest episodes or find the growing backlog of episodes daunting. It’s a great way to refresh yourself on what has gone before and jump in up to date! We’ll update the capsule overviews about a week after new episodes are released.

And what would be better than to enjoy reading the summaries while wearing an official Dead End Days quality garment from our brand new store? Of course if you signed up for our mailing list you knew about the store’s grand opening days ago (and maybe even got some super-secret deals). Sign up for our low-traffic mailing list (generally one “new episode” mail a week) in the box on the right so you don’t miss out the next time we feel like giving stuff away! But about the store, it’s full of amazing things! We have great shirts, nifty stickers, and more great shirts and nifty stickers! Did we mention all the procedes go to keep this site runing? Throw in some fantastic “grand opening” shipping specials and you have… well… a store in which we’re selling things for reasonable prices. But given the outrageous going prices for quality goods on the Internet, isn’t that enough?

I sure hope so, as that’s all we’ve got for you right now, but join us this Friday for a very special new episode which (finally) draws Halloween (our first day) to a close so we can really kick things into the next gear with “Day Two”. This (coupled with the easy to digest Story So Far summaries) make’s the next couple of weeks an excellent “jumping-on” point for new visitors, so please tell all and sundry about our little corner of the web!

See you in a few days!

• Search for: