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“You’re on CNN, the show that leads into mine is puppets making crank phone calls.”

October 22, 2004

Hey, ho, let’s go!

(I’ll wait until you get back)

Ahh… Satisfying no? I thought so. Hated those guys.

As I was laid up with a viral lungfection for a couple of days this week I had lots of time to think about what I was going to rant on tonight. I considered writing a 500 word ode to Katamari Daimacy (whose brilliant play and innovative design have captivated our hearts and occupied our PS2’s. I suggested to Jay and Matt that we re-write the end of “Days” to incorporate more “rolling” but they threatened to crack my head open with blunt instruments. Philistines. I thought about recapping the most excellent 2004 Rock Paper Scissors International World Championships or perhaps just stealing some links du jour off of Screenhead or Fark or Slashdot (The perk of writing these things in the wee hours waiting for the weeks episode to compile is that you rarely want to spend a lot of time stressing over the details).

Instead I return to the land of the living having completely missed the storm of controversy kicked up by one John Stewart over his appearance on the CNN mainstay “Crossfire”. Now for all of you, having lived through this once, I’m sure the item has been discussed to death. Respected brick-and-mortar news sources and those scary nefarious “bloggers” have all chimed in with their two cents and everyone’s moved on to some other celebrity cause, it’s Meme-time well and truly up. However, emerging from my fevered sleep like a caveman frozen in ice - ignorant of the eons that passed - that’s what I feel like talking about.

If you too were frozen in carbonite for the past week, the short summary is that the affable host of Comedy Central’s The Daily Show (the only thing that will brings disparate production activity at DED HQ to a nightly halt) appeared on CNN’s staple roundtable Crossfire specifically to tell “leftist” host Paul Begala and “rightist” host Tucker Carlson how much he despised the show and everything it stood for, and laid the blame for the decline in American political discourse at their feet.

The lengthy hyperlink above is to the “official” CNN transcript, but
there are a number of video feeds available on the netif you’d like to see the fireworks for yourself (thanks again to the Wonkette).

Perhaps not exactly the laugh-fest CNN was expecting although, as an aside, I have to wonder what they *were* expecting inviting Stewart onto the home turf of absent co-host Robert Novak who Stewart has repeatedly nominated for the “Congressional Medal of Douch-Baggery” several times in vitriolic tirades on his own program. CNN I am assuming did not want the program to bog down in pointed questions about why Novak chose to leak the name of CIA operative Valerie Plame in his nationally syndicated newspaper column, and as such called in alternate Republican co-host Tucker Calrson who managed to escape only with criticism to his fashion sense and hurt feelings from being called “a dick” by a frustrated Stewart.

Frankly, there’s not much I feel that I can add to this now passe debate at this late stage that hasn’t been addressed better elsewhere. Your local bar, coffee shop, or discussion forum likely has an active roundtable discussion on the matter in progress. Ours certainly does. What I will add is how frustrated the video clip made me with North American television in general. Not because of content - but of format.

Somehow plunked down in front of a (surprisingly entertaining) Red Sox Yankees game in full “Potato” mode one is less likely to question broadcast formatting than when one sits down to watch a distilled 99mb avi file of a news program that has not been edited to remove commercial breaks, bumpers, interstials… etc.

Is there that little content in a half hour television show? Do they show that many commercials? Do the “interstital bumpers” take up that much time? Do the hosts evade that many questions? One earnest UK writer on Aaron Swartz’s blog earnestly questioned whether or not an American journalist would be able to replicate what brit journalist Jeremy Paxman did when he repeated a question to the Home Secretary fourteen times to get a spin-free answer (or stall for time depending on who’s telling the story). Of course not. Where would they do it? The media is no longer a place where people ask you difficult questions - it is a great stage from which to release carefully prepared statements.

I am occasionally asked to speak with the press on work or play related matters and I’m amazed at how little inclined they are to ask questions requiring actual thought. I’ve spoken with media as dispirate as Australian Public Radio and Japanese television and, for the most part, questions are well formulated to let you talk about whatever you feel like for a 15-3o second sound-bite and they move on to their next target. Even evading the question entirely rarely gets you called on it. It’s a wonderful exercise for folks (like me) who like the theatre of improvisation, of coming up with interesting fabrication off the tops of ones head.

The difference is, I’m never relating information which is crucial to the good governance of a population. I’m talking about a movie, or a sport, or some event and, as such, have never really questioned my willingness to game the system. After Stewarts fracas on Crossfire though I have to ask myself how long has it been since I’ve been surprised by something I’ve seen on a political talk show? And how surprising would it have been to talk to the press and actually have them ask a question that required more than regurgitating good-sounding snippets to answer?

I find my personal answers to both the above questions sobering.

As a Canadian, with no legal standing whatsoever in next months presidential election - I ask a favour to our US audience (and stat logs tell me you do exist).

Take ten minutes. Go to “Google” and pick an election topic that’s important to you. Find out party platforms. Look up what the non-mainstream pundits say. Read some viewpoints of your fellow Americans. Then, take ten minutes and make an effort to look up viewpoints from sources you know will grate with you. Then, please, make sure that on November 2nd you vote your conscience - whatever that may be.

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